Monday, August 19, 2013

Taking one's lumps

My grandmother told me a story about being pulled over by a police officer (or perhaps my Mom was telling the story about her Mom.  It works either way).  My grandma said she just started crying.  She couldn't stop.  I don't know if she was deliberately trying to get out of a ticket, or was simply under an intense amount of stress.  In the end, the officer (male) let her go with a warning.

I tend to be outspoken and opinionated, which I've tried to reign back in recent years.  I don't have "feminist" tattooed on my forehead.  I believe in equal rights and opportunities for everyone, regardless of gender. 

So I was surprised to find out an acquaintance had figured me out. The acquaintance observed (to my husband) that I was not the type of woman who would cry to get out of a ticket. 

And he's right.

I wouldn't (and haven't) cried to get out of a speeding ticket.  To my mind, if I was speeding (or I ran a stop sign), I will own up to it.  Some would argue, in a flawed system, I should take every advantage I can get.  And yes, it is a flawed system. But things have changed (quite a bit) for women. And it's legal for us to drive (unlike some places in the world).  And despite all of that, it's quite possible that I would still get the ticket, despite the waterworks.

The observation was an amusing anecdote.  It's always interesting to find out what other people think of you - if they're picking up on the messages you're sending (or misreading them).  Nevertheless, I took it as a compliment, because it's true. 

I expect equal treatment and consideration, and I'm not about to tap into the patriarchy/ "Fascinating Womanhood" if it will limit my choices or the choices of other women.

1 comment:

Freckle Face Girl said...

That is a great compliment! It is better to face up to whatever issue you are dealing with. I always wondered how women who do it can get away with it. I am not much for crying and I definitely couldn't turn it on for silly reasons.