When I was younger, and more naive - I remember introducing two groups of my friends. I was a sophomore in high school. I thought that everyone would get along, naturally. Perhaps it was arrogance on my part, maybe I thought since *I* got along with them, then they would get along with one another.
So it was a bit shocking to me when my friends did not get along, and did not want to spend time together. There wasn't outward hostility, but a polite disinterest.
As an adult, I have continued to find such situations. Being married, it becomes even more advantageous to find friends that get along with my husband. And now, as a mom, it's important to find friends who can tolerate little people. For me, it's not a matter of being good with kids, but simply not running from the room screaming when someone asks a question or throws a small tantrum.
So it's been interesting to me as an adult when people try to dissuade me from a friendship with another person. Most people respect that friends will disagree and have different interests. There are religious differences, differences in parenting styles, musical tastes, etc.
I've just found it fascinating when other adults try to manipulate or even outwardly say something like "I don't know how you can be friends with that person. They did x." or " they said x" or "their political or religious beliefs are x". I can't help it, it reminds me of high school.
It's not that I'm not constantly working on my friendships, taking in new information. But just because *I* may have differences with someone (religiously, politically, personal habits) doesn't mean that I expect everyone to lose those friendships. I'm not so insecure to need loyalty and play into cliques. Sure, if someone is accused of abuse or other dangerous behavior, that's one thing. Or if they are clearly racist, misogynist or homophobic (so much so that it's uncomfortable).
But for the most part, the fact that someone likes Spongebob or drives an SUV is not an automatic strike on my part.
How many friendships would I have lost out on if I had been so picky?