Can someone explain this statement to me?
Because if you can explain it and where it comes from, I would appreciate it. Because I am having a hard time understanding it. This is something I've heard in the past few years, not a quote from the fifties. Is it just a midwest thing?
Specifically, I spoke with someone who was unhappy to hear he was having a daughter, because the daughter would be his wife's.
It seems to me that most parents are lucky to have a healthy child growing up in a safe, nurturing environment.
Yes, there are still lots of gender roles and stereotypes. I may yet write about my company's dress code as a glaringly obvious example of different standards for men and women. Women struggle to make gains in public life, balance family concerns and be successful in their careers if they choose.
So in American society, it comes as no surprise that men and women are different.
But the idea that someone's daughter wouldn't be "theirs" since their wife would raise them or that a son would be the husband's - just sounds odd and foreign to me. Frankly, I think it smacks of sexism. It limits what the son and the daughter can do and what things they will enjoy. So your daughter enjoys watching football with you? Or your son enjoys cooking? Who cares??!?
Maybe this is so foreign to me since my parents raised me to think for myself and to question. I don't remember being told I couldn't have a career (when many parents told their girls they would be wives and mothers). To some extent, my parents don't follow strict gender roles.
I remember my Mom visiting my apartment in college and flipping over the vacuum cleaner to fix it. I had just mentioned that it wasn't working. My dad would let us watch while he fixed the cars. He would prop up the car hood and show us where the radiator fluid went, how to check the oil. They worked very hard to make sure I got the best education possible. Never did they say - why waste the money for college on our daughter! She'll just get married anyway.
I guess all I'm saying is, it is a little sad to hear a mom say that the son is not hers or a dad say his daughter is not his. I think it leaves out just how complex these relationships are. And children really benefit from both parents (and people in general) who love and support them. No matter what gender they are.